For those of you who have been following my career since before
When All Else Fails (EP), you may remember me as being adamant about the title "recording artist" and always having a thousand excuses why I couldn't play live. I would even say, at times, that I had no desire to play live.
That was all bollocks! The two reasons why I played so few shows (usually dropping out of half of the shows I would schedule) were this:
1. I was too scared.
2. I didn't think I could do it.
Do you know what else was bollocks? Saying that I didn't want to play live. The whole time... I wanted nothing more than to be a successful, touring artist.
It's too long of a story to tell you here where this fear came from... and an even longer story why I finally swallowed that fear and went for it, but I did. When I moved to London (from Northern Ireland), I made the decision that I was going to actually do it this time. I hadn't played a show (that wasn't radio) in 2 1/2 years. I was terrified, but I went for it. I booked shows before I even bought instruments to play on! I got myself into situations that I couldn't back out of. In total, I played 9 gigs this summer... each set a little longer, each performance a little better.
Being an established recording artist for over 10 years was more of a hindrance at first than anything. I knew mistakes I was making and opportunities I was missing, like not collecting email addresses for the mailing list or selling CDs from the stage. I had to accept that I was starting from scratch in this area of the business,
and I had to take it easy on myself and give myself time to grow into something bigger and better that matches what I have already
accomplished in the recording world.
I had one goal that I wanted to reach by the end of the summer tour: to get over the fear. I'm happy to tell you... I have been successful. I can't say that I am never going to have a nervous moment again or have shaking hands at the beginning of the set... but I can tell you that I am never again going to cancel a show because I'm too petrified to do it!
I am now having a 6 1/2 week break until I begin my autumn tour. It's not really a break at all though. If anything, I am busier than ever preparing for Phase Two... where everything is getting turned up a notch and taken to a new level. I've learned many things over the summer, which I will be implementing this autumn with my newfound freedom from fear!
Thank you so much to those of you who came out to see me live an support me this Summer! It meant a lot to me! And if I didn't play in your area... well then... Demand that I do!